Time For A "STATE OF YOUR UNION"
January is the month that we review the events of the last year. The President gives us a State of the Union Address. He reviews last year and gives us his plans for the next year. Some Churches report on their finances and present the vision for the next twelve months. Many pastors develop a catchy phrase to help congregants catch the vision. All mortgage companies send you a report on the interest you paid last year.
As head of our household should we be doing any less? Shouldn’t we be reviewing the state of our unions? Is the state of your marriage union stronger than last year? Are your children wiser and more competent than they were this time last year, or are they just twelve months older? This month is a time for reviewing our past and in many cases a time for planning for our future.
When the President gives his State of the Union Address, he does more than just review the past. We expectantly wait for him to give his agenda for the future--the things he plans to accomplish the next year.
The point of a family state of the union review is not just to lament over the fact that another year has past. It is important to look at your marriage and your parenting to look at the areas that should be shored up. But don’t stop there. This month, put into operation a plan of action to reach important family goals in 2006.
Start with the easiest area: Parenting. What one thing would you like to teach each child this year? Take a look at what you believe each individual in your care needs.
During o ne season of parenting, our twelve-year-old daughter needed help in overcoming a critical attitude towards family members. To help her, we formulated a plan by keeping track of her positive and encouraging statements. We hung a poster board on the refrigerator and placed a hash mark for each postive or encouraging statement. Each time she reached a certain number of positive statements, she received a privilege. To help motive her even further, we placed our names on the poster board so people could help track each of us.
What area of character or training would you like to see your child grow in this year? The character you want to develop will not happen accidentally. As parents, we must discover the need and then develop a plan to help your child succeed.
After doing a parenting audit putting your plan into action, it is time to take an evening to discuss the marriage. Is your marriage better and stronger since last January or have you become too busy and stagnant? It is not unusual for one spouse to feel confident about the state of the marriage only to find that the other spouse is lonelier than ever.
What one area of your marriage will you work on as you enter the new year. One area we always battle in is a time for communication. Our action plan was to sit together, get the calendar and block out large blocks of time to be alone together during the first quarter of the year. One president promised a chicken in every pot. We decided to promise an evening alone every week.
The final State of the Union Review needs to be about your relationship with the LORD. Are you closer to the Lord this year than you were this time last year? If you are not-- then why not? What do you plan to do about it? Once again, when is your alone time with the One who knows that plans He has for you (Jeremiah 29:11).
Every other organization seems to see value in looking at the past year and making commitments for the next year. How much more important must it be for the family, the most important institution in our culture?
Twelve months from now when you are reviewing the year 2006, don’t catch yourself saying, “I wish I had.” Do your own State of the Union Address and institue a plan of action so you can say, “I’m glad I did!” What one thing will you work on this New Year. Now is the time to begin.