Why Are Today’s Teens So Violent?

Does it seem like there’s more teen violence today than there used to be?   Every week there is a new story in the headlines that elicits the same response, “We didn’t expect that to happen here,” or “We never thought that child would do that.”   Should we really be surprised?  There is more teen anger; and it’s understandable.

Under the disguise of teen privacy and personal rights, we have left today’s teen without the one thing they should have the right to have – protection. Today’s teen is desperately in need of protection from the myriad of unhealthy influences in their lives.

Picture the world of today’s teen.  The one thing today’s teens desperately have the right to trust… to count on… is the stability of their family.  However, half of them only have one parent in the home.  Their “truster” is broken because their family life is broken.

Picture their environments.  School is supposed to be a safe place; a place created by the community for teens to go and learn.  Instead, school has become such an unsafe environment that most adults would not choose to work there in fear of being injured.  They have metal detectors welcoming students and police or security guards greeting them in the hallways.  The take away for students is that adults don’t really care or, at least, care enough to make the school environment as safe as their work environments.

Another environment where they need protection is cyber-world.  Today’s teen is given the right to communicate with anyone at anytime via a multitude of cyber-devices and often times without any parental supervision.  If I wouldn’t let a stranger come into my house and sit in my teen’s bedroom, then why would I let a stranger do it via the cyber-world?

No wonder teens are so angry.  No wonder they are acting out the violent moves they have played and practiced on the video and internet games.  Many teens are angry, but there is an easy answer for parents – a response.  The response is something everyone can do; it’s called relationship.

The changeable part of the equation regarding teen anger is the schedule of the parent.  Teens need to know that their parents aren’t too busy or absent altogether.  Whether it is a one-parent household or two-parent household, the teen needs a relationship with a parent who will not require them to perform for attention.

Here’s the trick.  Teens will often act like they don’t want a relationship with their parents.  Yet deep down inside, most of them want a relationship with a parent or adult who can show them the ropes and who they can trust with their greatest fears.  One of the obvious reasons the teens make great life changes here at Sheridan House is because they are introduced to adults who care.  Yes, there’s still discipline and accountability, but the adults still care and they express their caring attitude.

Today’s parent can combat teen violence by deciding right now that it’s time for a relationship.  If your teen is older, expect resistance.  Regardless, set the appointments for spending “uninterrupted by anyone’s mobile phone” time together.  Then, choose to listen!

The violence is screaming at teens prompting them to question, “Whose am I anyway!?”  Parents need to be saying, “You are mine.  I love you. I value you… and I’m re-arranging my schedule so we can spend time together!”

Each teen desires and needs to belong to something.  Left alone, it could be a gang or a boy/girlfriend relationship.  If parents decide to be intentional, it should be a family, a church youth group, and ultimately, Jesus Christ.

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